#140 Acting Before Thinking

"Think before you act."

I honestly can't think of a more fundamental principle of adulthood, especially when it comes to maintaining relationships.

While I was finishing up in the shower the other night, my spouse was getting ready for bed. Over the shower, I stated, "I'd like to change the sheets tonight, can you get it started? I can help when I'm out."

My spouse replied, "I guess."

I finished getting out of the shower and drying off when I hear my spouse flop onto the bed after the sheet-changing had been completed without my assistance. Below is the actual conversation that took place.

spouse: AHHHHHHHHHHHH, stinky sheets.
me: Stinky sheets?
spouse: Yeah, it smells like you washed them with the vacuum cleaner.
me: Did you smell them before you took the dirty ones off the bed?
spouse: yeah, but what was I supposed to do?
me: Maybe NOT change the sheets?!

My spouse then proceeded to strip the bed so that now both sets - the "dirty" sheets and pillow cases as well as the "stinky" sheets and pillow cases - were in the dirty clothes bin. After that, my spouse removed their pajamas and put them into the dirty clothes bin as well.

me: Was it that bad that your pajamas stunk after just laying on the stinky sheets for like five seconds?
spouse: They stunk. (puts everything in the washer) Do we have any other sheets or pillow cases?
me: No.

I am a reasonable and logical person. If I came out of the shower and the sheets were not changed, I would ask why. I would also agree that they should not be changed if the only other set of sheets we had stunk so horrendously that the smell would permeate our clothes and bodies overnight (or within minutes?!). Why on earth would my spouse continue changing the sheets if the new ones stunk from (probably) being left in the washer too long???

#139 Easter Weekend

I'm not one to post about religious things because people get their panties in a bunch over the stupidest shit, but this topic is somewhat religious-related but is not bashing any religion. I'm not here to discuss religion. I'm here to discuss what bothers me, and it relates to a religious holiday. Relax.

If you do a quick Google search on what is Easter, you will find out that Easter is defined as "the most important and oldest festival of the Christian Church, celebrating the resurrection of Jesus Christ and held (in the Western Church) between March 21 and April 25, on the first Sunday after the first full moon following the northern spring equinox."

If you're like me, you only care about Easter weekend because it means having Good Friday off work and Reese's Eggs are for sale in retail stores.

I'm not minimizing the importance of this holiday for some people, but for me it's not. It has also become an "American" holiday since it has become largely observed by corporations and they provide a day off for their employees.

What bothers me about it is the fact that it moves every year, yet some people still refer to it as if everyone knows when it occurs.

According to the definition above, Easter can occur anywhere between March 21 and April 25, depending on the lunar calendar. I would venture to guess that the majority of people don't follow the lunar calendar, and currently require the internet (or some other published source) to let them know when Easter is going to occur that year (or subsequent years). That means that Easter could potentially occur during any of FIVE WEEKS during a calendar year!

Here's a scenario:

Friend: Let's take a trip to Florida.
Me: Sure, when do you want to go?
Friend: Let's go over Labor Day weekend.
Me: I'm available then; let's do it.

You see, everyone here knows that, in America, Labor Day occurs on the first Monday of September. Labor Day weekend would be the Saturday and Sunday leading up to Labor Day, and generally people get that Monday off, too. My point is that EVERYONE KNOWS WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT when you say "Labor Day weekend."

Here's the same scenario again, except using Easter as an example instead:

Friend: Let's take a trip to Florida.
Me: Sure, when do you want to go?
Friend: Let's go over Easter weekend.
Me: WHEN THE FUCK IS THAT???!?!??!?!?!?!
Friend: Well it's the first Sunday after the first full moon following the northern spring equinox, duh.

If you're one of these people who just assumes everyone knows when Easter weekend occurs, cut it out. Do everyone around you a favor and specify when you're planning something that references "Easter weekend." If you assume that I know when Easter occurs, expect to have the following conversation.

Someone: Please come to my house on Easter Sunday.
Me: GIMME A FUCKING DATE, IDIOT.

#138 Separately Teleconferencing

I work in an office with approximately 90-100 people. This building is kind of split up into different smaller sections, and at a maximum there are 21 people sitting in the same area as me.

Often, some of these people will be participating in the same teleconference. That is, several people will be on the same phone call at the same time. This becomes very frustrating to be nearby once the call gets underway because they're trying to talk over one another and end up being much louder than they need to be. In addition, sometimes one or more of them put it on speaker-phone at their desks, and there's a lag between when they talk and when it comes through the phone line. This creates an echo effect, and essentially listeners in the office are subjected to hearing one person speak twice.

Sometimes one or more of these people in the office will actually put their headset on mute, stand up, and speak to one another over the cubicles while at their respective desks. WHY???!?!?!??!?

Despite being aggravated by listening to participants speaking too loudly in the office space, and having to hear people's echo, my main gripe is this burning question: why don't they just book a conference room and get on the call together? There are several conference rooms available at any one given time. In fact, there is one less than 40 feet away from anyone in this area of the office! Not only would this solve the loud-talking and echo issues, but they could even talk amongst themselves without participating in the call if they chose to do so (side discussions), eliminating the obvious issue of satisfying one's own needs at the expense of others.

#136 Sink Strainer Replacement

Like many households, my kitchen features a double sink. On one side there is a garbage disposal, and on the other side there is a drain with a basket-style strainer. For the most part, the strainer stays in the drain-only side, and only gets removed when there is debris in the strainer or if it deserves a run through the dishwasher. At least, this is how I handle the strainer. The other adult that I live with apparently thinks otherwise.

It is obvious when they decide to do the "cleaning" because I will find the sink in this state:

Let's say I want to pre-soak something (a heavy pot, perhaps) in the drain side because that side happens to be larger and more accommodating than the disposal side. Rather than just placing it in the sink, I have to first go make sure that there are no obstructions (like the fucking strainer) before I set it down. If the strainer is NOT in the drain, then I have to return the heavy pot to (probably) the stove, then go back and put the strainer in the drain, and then start all over again. Why can't I just assume the strainer is in place rather than having to check for it each time?!

I'm left wondering why this is necessary. Why not put it back in the drain? Why leave it upside down outside the drain? Did they want it to dry thoroughly? - can't that happen while it is sitting in the drain while the sink is not in use?? I seriously can not think of one single instance why it would be beneficial to leave it out of the drain.

#135 Fire Hydrant Obstruction

I am a full-time resident of a community of approximately 700 people. However, every summer, the population of my community jumps to about ten times that. Many people have summer homes or cottages that they visit on the weekends, and from Memorial Day through Labor Day my community is a busy, bustling place. We locals call these people "cidiots." City + idiot = cidiot. Here's one of the many reasons:

The Licensing and Regulatory Affairs in the state in which I live have posted press releases in recent years reminding residents to keep a 3-foot minimum radius of clearance from fire hydrants so that first responders can quickly access this essential equipment. These press releases are generally released during the winter months when snow removal is a total pain in the ass essential, but it really applies all year round.

I'm struggling to understand the logic behind placing the trash bags immediately surrounding the fire hydrant. This particular residence has at least 60 feet of street frontage, not including the driveway. Why was this location selected out of all other potential locations? Did the residents think that the trash collectors would not see their heaping pile of garbage bags if they were in a different location - perhaps 20 or 30 feet away? I mean, it is literally the trash collectors' job to drive up and down the street and collect the garbage at the side of the road. There could be no possible way that they would miss this heap if it were anywhere else along the property line.

Considering the location of this particular hydrant, I am extremely pissed off that these residents think this is acceptable. This is the closest hydrant to my house, and if a fire occurred and the hydrant needed to be accessed, this could potentially cause a delay with getting water onto the fire. I wonder if the people who dumped this garbage considered the same for their cottage? Oh right, probably not, because they don't really "need" their cottage. They would likely be pleased they could claim it as a total loss and get a big fat check to build a new cottage in its place.

So, yeah: cidiots.

#134 Shopping Carts (Proper Disposition - Part 2)

I should have added this to my rant in #074 of my blog, but this instance was so ridiculous I couldn't even fathom the possibility of this even happening, which is why I didn't include it previously.

Why? I just....... How could you even........ Are you fucking kidding me?

I couldn't just ignore your incomprehensible and inexcusable shopping cart placement and just drive away (forward) from the situation since there was clearly another car parked in front of me. You have purposely inconvenienced someone else (in this case, ME) by being such a lazy piece of shit that you couldn't move your shopping cart elsewhere when you were finished with it. What the fuck is wrong with you?! You were obviously not parked in a designated handicapped spot - to which I still would have been pissed off but slightly less so, considering the possibility of whatever handicap you could be facing.

Dick move, man. DICK. MOVE.

#132 Driving Without Confidence

I have a 46-mile commute to work (one-way) each weekday. I don't love that I have a long commute, but I do love where I live and that makes up for the amount of time I spend in my car every day. Public transportation is not an option for me in my area, so I am forced to drive my vehicle. I have accepted this fact a long time ago.

Also, I live in an area of the United States which experiences all four seasons, and the winter season can last anywhere between November and March depending on the weather patterns. This can make commuting to-and-from work a bit of a nightmare for me and the many other drivers on the road.

At the beginning of my commute I have to navigate 17 miles to the nearest interstate, and 11 of those miles is a 2-lane road (one lane in either direction). There are back / country roads that could be taken as an alternative route, but these 11 miles of 2-lane roadway is the main thoroughfare for practically everyone in my surrounding neighborhoods. The speed limit is 50 miles per hour so it goes by quickly, especially since everyone routinely drives 5-15 mph over the speed limit.

This particular 2-lane roadway is not very straight. That is, the road twists and curves gradually around a body of water. This enables a great line of sight between the front of the "line" of cars, and the back of the "line" when there is traffic.

Overnight we experienced a light dusting of snow, but nothing that was threatening to the roadways. This morning had very heavy traffic conditions on this 2-lane road, and it wasn't until I got around a curve did I realize what the holdup was: an uneasy driver, at the front of the line, literally holding up over 80 vehicles.

First of all, safety is critical. I don't fault this woman (and it was a woman) for driving slowly. What I DO fault her for is not getting out of the fucking way. At the beginning of this 11-mile stretch, traffic was already moving slowly. So slowly, in fact, that traffic was moving along at a whopping 31 miles per hour with a lot of stop-and-go action. At the moment the road first curved and I could see what was going on, I knew that my commute was going to suck hard.

People began passing when it was safe to do so. As I mentioned, this particular road is a main thoroughfare both in and out of town, so it's not like there wasn't any traffic going the other way. People were so desperate to pass her that they often used a center turn lane when it became available (for a short stretch of road), and some even used the shoulder.

Here's my main complaint: she could see both in front of and behind her vehicle for quite a ways (up to a mile in some spots!). She could definitely see that traffic was piling up behind her. She could definitely see that people were attempting to pass her illegally. It is my opinion that if she noticed these things, she should have pulled off the road, let traffic pass her by, then proceed to continue slowly with her commute. She shouldn't make everyone else suffer because of her lack of confidence on the road.

Once I was able to pass her, my timing was already pushed back into rush hour even worse than it was to start with. My commute this morning which normally takes about an hour, took nearly 2 hours because of the initial delay and now the additional traffic. Thanks a lot, bitch. As if my blood pressure wasn't high enough already.

#131 Punctuality (Time Management)

I have previously written about my mandatory one-hour lunch at work, and I have also written about punctuality in general. This particular rant encompasses both.

Every day at 11:30 I have to take my hour-long lunch. Every. Day. At 11:30. This never changes.

Every day at 11:30 I have agreed to leave work with someone to go run errands and grab lunch on the way. Every. Day. At 11:30. This never changes.

Yet EVERY DAY I am left searching the office for this person, or fetching this person from their desk at 11:30. Why? Well, that is a very good question. I would like to know the answer myself!

In a perfect world, I would look up at my rear-view desk mirror and notice that this person is walking up behind me with their coat on and car keys in hand. Ultimately, this is the goal. Perhaps I haven't nagged them enough yet. Perhaps I haven't trained them hard enough. Perhaps I haven't given them enough shit about how much it aggravates me that I have to go and search for them or remind them of the time. Perhaps they're just a self-centered dick who doesn't care about my feelings or being on time for any.fucking.thing in the world. Perhaps they just don't care.

I have even scheduled a reminder in their work calendar so that it pops up to remind them that in 15 minutes they should be leaving. The reminder is also set to pop up at 11:25 to give them a 5-minute heads-up. And, once again, it will remind them at 11:30, practically shouting, "Get off your ass, put your coat on, and walk over to Melanie's desk because it's TIME TO GO."

I doubt I will ever understand why people seem to lack the ability to manage their time properly, especially when their actions (or lack of actions) affect others. It seems like these people will never understand how truly frustrating they are to people like me.

#130 Restroom Stall Spacing

Having to use a public restroom while at work is a reality for many people. It's bad enough that we have to do our private business in a not-very-private place, but if people paid more attention to stall spacing (or urinal spacing, if you're male) things would be slightly less uncomfortable.

From what I understand, men have a hard-and-fast rule about using public urinals: always leave at least a one-urinal buffer between yourself and the next guy. This is especially important for the first guy up to the urinal: he sets the spacing for all those that follow him while he's in there.

I really wish that women would follow this thinking. Here is a photo of a restroom that I was in today.

Twice today when I went into this restroom someone was in the #2 standard-sized stall. In order to create (what I consider) proper spacing, what she should have done was chosen either the #1 or #3 standard-sized stall, or the handicap stall. Since the toilet in the handicap stall is against the far wall, there is already a built-in buffer between the handicap stall and the #3 standard-sized stall, so one person could occupy each of those and still have decent spacing between them. This would allow a third person to use the restroom in the #1 stall, all while maintaining the comfort of adequate spacing.

Hearing other people urinate is not so much an issue, but hearing other people poop is just disgusting. The farther away from me that you are while you're doing it, the better. Everyone poops, but I really don't want to hear it or even think about other people doing it.

#129 Vehicle Locking (Key Fob)

I drive over 100 miles every weekday. The bulk of these miles are accumulated going to and from work, but the additional few miles here and there are made going out to lunch or making stops along the way. Due to this massive amount of driving, my coworker and I take turns behind the wheel.

One thing that drives me insane (and believe me, there are many) is the fact that my coworker refuses to use the key fob to lock the doors while walking away from parking the vehicle. Rather than use the key fob when both of us have closed the doors, he will lock the vehicle from the switch on the inside of the door as he's exiting the vehicle. This occurs when he's either the driver OR the passenger.

I guess this wouldn't be such a big deal if I didn't keep my purse in the rear seat, but every time I pop out of the vehicle and quickly try to open the rear door before he's hit the lock button, I rarely make it before he's done it. Then I have to wait for him to pull the keys back out of his pocket, locate the unlock button, then unlock the car, wait for me to pull out my purse, close the door, and then lock it again.

While I agree that keeping my purse in the rear seat is not the most efficient place for it to be located, I will argue that it is the best place for it for several reasons: 1. I don't want to put it on the floor because the floor is dirty, 2. the center console is not a suitable place for it, 3. I don't want to hold it for an hour while I'm a passenger, 4. it won't fit on my body while I'm buckled in as a driver, 5. it is less likely to cause injury in the event of a collision.

It's not like we're going to (or live in) a crime-ridden community. He attributes it more to habit than anything else. My question is whether he wants to make it a habit of me yelling at him, or just NOT hitting the lock button before closing his door?

#128 Carry-On Luggage Placement

I have been doing a fair amount of travelling lately. Primarily I fly coach, but I have also had the pleasure of flying first class as well. Regardless of where I'm seated, I feel that it is only courteous to abide by the unspoken rules of air travel with respect to carry-on luggage: only place your item(s) above or very near to your seat.

Including users' opinions, this article points out that everyone is entitled to any overhead bin located within their respective class. While I am willing to agree that this might be the case, I do not think it is fair or courteous by any means.

My particular gripe regarding this issue describes people who are seated near the rear of the plane, who feel that inserting their luggage near the front of the plane will help them get off the plane more quickly. I'm not talking about people who board the plane at the very last second, and place their luggage in the only space left - which happens to be near the front of the plane. I'm talking about people who voluntarily board the plane in random order, and obviously and deliberately place their luggage much farther forward on the plane than where they are to be seated.

I do not feel this behavior leads to any increased efficiencies whatsoever. In fact, quite the contrary.

Many bags look the same these days. Foolishly, luggage manufacturers continue to produce pieces of luggage which are black and/or grey, with zippers in the same locations, with rollers and a telescoping handle. My issue is not so much over the design of current luggage, but rather their individuality, namely their color (or lack of color variety). It is now more complicated to select your bag from "your" overhead bin since now you have several options.

Some people are a bit vertically challenged, and have a hard enough time putting up and pulling down their own luggage, but now they have to contend with people who have a sense of entitlement regarding their luggage placement when it comes to the simplicity of the boarding and deplaning the aircraft.

Often times, these people who are placing their luggage forward in the cabin are concerned that they are not going to be able to fit their luggage near their seat because perhaps their luggage might be a bit oversized. Here's a tip: most flight attendants are more than pleased to gate-check your bag for you, especially on a full or very-full flight. If you're near the rear of the plane, the luggage handlers will likely retrieve your bag and have it at the gate for you by the time you actually reach the front of the plane!

Some people are worried that if they gate-check their bag, it might get lost. Quite the opposite is true, actually! There's a better chance for your bag to get lost if you fully check your bag (at the ticketing counter prior to the security checkpoint) as opposed to checking it in the gate. Never gate-checked a bag? Here's what happens: a luggage handler, from outside the aircraft, climbs up the stairs outside the skyway, retrieves your bag, and safely places it under the plane. When you land, the same thing happens in reverse order. It's not going anywhere! Seriously!

Everybody on the same plane has probably paid more money than they wished in order to take the flight that they're on, and since everyone is already on edge with security issues and personal space, people should just suck it up and be courteous to others, no matter what that might require. If that means bringing a smaller bag and less stuff, so be it.

#127 Inconsideration (Time)

Time is incredibly valuable; you can never get it back. What we do with our personal time is sacred these days, so when someone is inconsiderate of my time I get really frustrated.

I recently borrowed a vehicle from someone to use for a specific purpose. They knew I was coming to pick it up at least a few hours in advance. They knew approximately what time I would be arriving and they knew that I only had a short amount of time to pick it up and leave since I was on my lunch hour from work. They also knew that I had to rely on someone else to take me there, therefore using up someone else’s valuable time.

When I arrived, they were completely ill-prepared. They didn't greet me at the door when I arrived. They took their time coming outside. They didn't have the keys ready. They didn't have essential items cleared out of it. They couldn't locate the key fob. They proceeded to engage in a lengthy conversation about some random crap that had nothing to do with the vehicle.

Something that could have literally taken less than 5 minutes took nearly 20 minutes.

Then another incident happened with the same person. This person needed something that I had in my possession, and called me at 10:15 pm to ask me to bring it with me to work the next day. This person was going out of town and needed what I had. Since I was nearly in bed by this point, I had to get dressed to go outside to the garage to fetch what they needed, then put it in my vehicle to take to work the next day.

Once I got to work the next day, they called and said they were coming to pick it up from my place of employment, but that they needed to shower first but they would be there in 20 minutes. With this person, 20 minutes = at least 35. I was leaving work in 30 minutes (again, they waited until the very last possible moment) and I was not about to be late because I have commitments that need to be kept. There was NO WAY this person was going to make it by the time I left. Instead, this person had to go out of their way to get what they needed rather than making a compromise with me, which ended up making them irritated and put off because of the situation.

IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE THIS WAY, PEOPLE.

Simple preparation and adequate communication solves lots of headaches down the road. Just take a couple minutes to prepare for the situation ahead of you, discuss the details with those parties affected, and you will make those around you happy.

If you don't have time to prepare ahead of time, at least let the other person(s) know. They may be able to adjust their schedule to better accommodate the situation, and won't be so disappointed and frustrated when they arrive and have to deal with your lack of preparation and wasting their precious time.

#126 Saying: "Do what now?"

I have previously written about having to repeat myself and how much I dislike doing so. Recently I have had some interactions with people located outside of my home state, and they repeat a phrase which they intend for me to repeat myself or clarify further. This phrase is, "Do what now?"

After doing a little bit of research on the internet, apparently (according to non-published sources) this is a "Southern U.S." colloquialism. I would say that I can agree with the fact that it could potentially be a regional saying, much like soda is represented by soda / soft drink / pop / soda pop, etc. in different parts of the United States, but I’m not convinced it is only prevalent in the South.

This phrase frustrates me. Saying "Do what now?" implies that I asked you to do something. I'm not asking anyone to do anything. If you didn't hear me, you can simply use other words to ask me to repeat what I said. If I ask, "How many pencils are on the table?" or, "How is your sister feeling?" this should elicit a singular, definitive answer, and then maybe an further explanation if necessary.

It is entirely possible that the people who use this phrase often are not even aware that they are doing so. It is also entirely possible that people say this all the time and other people simply do not recognize that it is being said, or simply don't care. I tend to pay very close attention to detail, and I pick up on things like this – for better or worse.

I sincerely feel that the world would be a better place if everyone was more self-aware.

#125 Incomplete Responses (e-mail)

In today's information age, it is quite easy to exchange information electronically both with people you know and people you don't know. In response to an ad posted by someone I don't know, I discussed the possibility of this person renting out my camper for a one- or two-week period of time. This exchange was occurring over a community-networking site which allows (verified) neighbors to communicate with one another, ask questions, post events, etc. Everything about this particular interaction with this woman was completely annoying and cumbersome.

It should be noted that she posted an ad about the camper a couple of months ago. I read this ad when she posted it, but I didn't really consider it until recently. I contacted her privately through the site and asked her if she was still looking to rent a camper. Every response she gave me was incomplete! I would ask her a couple of questions, then she would only answer one. Or I would ask her a two-part question and she would only answer maybe one (if any!) of it. Here is how the conversation went:

First of all, her name is Lisa, but after I called her I found out she pronounces it "Lissa". WTF?!? Also, I was asking her all of these questions because I want to know what's involved here. I could charge her a smaller fee for a week if she was going to pick it up / drop it off herself and clean it out and everything, or I could charge her more depending on what all she needed. If we have to clean out the shitter, you bet your ass I'm charging more!

Me: Hi Lisa, are you still looking to rent a camper?
(three days later) Lisa: Could you tell me about the camper, size etc?
Me: I think it is a 26-foot or 28-foot camper. It is a fifth-wheel.
Lisa: How much would you charge a week or 2?
Me: Do you have a hookup for a fifth wheel (to trailer it)? Are you going to be taking it somewhere?
Lisa: No it would be at our house.
Me: Will there be children staying in it, or just adults? This camper also has a toilet, shower, stove, fridge, etc. Do you need to use all of those things or is it mainly just going to be for sleeping? Do you have dates? We are going on vacation in September so I just want to make sure we will be around to bring it to you when the time comes.
Lisa: Adults maybe a week or 2 in July. We are building a house which is almost done we ar waiting for the power to be done from [electric company].
Me: Will you be using the stove and fridge? I assume your house plumbing will be working so you won’t need running water in the camper.
Lisa: Wouldn’t use the stove etc but might use the water
Me: Would you use the toilet? Do you have your water hooked up yet?
Lisa: Don’t have water yet suppose to be this week do you want to just call me xxx-xxx-xxxx?
Me: Can I call you this evening around 8pm?
Lisa: Yes thank you

At exactly 8:00 (on the dot!) I called her but she didn't answer. I assumed that perhaps she wouldn't take calls from phone numbers she didn't recognize, but the fact that she should have been expecting my call and she still didn't answer was ridiculously annoying. I waited five minutes and called her again, and she didn't answer again. I left her a voicemail asking her not to return my call after 9pm because my small child would be sleeping. She called back around 8:45pm, citing some excuse that she left her phone in the house which she apparently never EVER does, and she apologized.

I just don't understand; if it was going to be so difficult (for her) to communicate her needs over the internet, why didn't she just offer he phone number sooner? It would have saved both of us a ton of time. I wouldn't have had to ask her several questions only for her to answer one. I hope all of this effort doesn’t go to waste, and I hope I can profit by letting her rent the camper! What a pain in the ass.

#123 Voice Volume

A guy that I work with is notorious for having a loud, booming voice. Apparently all of our company's customers that interact with him just love him because he's nice or whatever, but I am so annoyed by him for many, many reasons.

When I first started working at this company, we had to work on a project together. He called me by a different name on a number of occasions: Melissa, Michelle, Lisa (don't ask me how you get Lisa from Melanie... I will never know). He has also sent numerous emails to a different Melanie (probably the only other person in the entire company who shares my first name) because he once sent her an email so her name pops up in the "To:" field first (and he's too oblivious to notice). My name is not that difficult. If I had a strange or unusual name that is predominant in a foreign country, I could totally understand that someone could have some difficulty with it. I could also understand if perhaps we didn't work together often, but this guy saw me in the office every single day.

He also draws out many filler words. "Yeaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh" or "oooooooooooookaaaaaaaayyyy" or even "wellllllllllllllllll" are ones he uses often. Then he passes by and starts off with, "Heeeeeeeeyyyyy there." A simple, "Good morning" or "Hello" would suffice, thanks.

This guy is lucky enough to have an office. He frequently has conversations with coworkers outside of his office, and his voice can literally be heard clear across half the building (or farther!). This is particularly distracting when a) I'm on the phone (this causes difficulty hearing the person(s) on the other end of the line, and b) when the conversation is non-work related, which is often the case.

Actually, conversations that occur within his office are particularly distracting as well. He will actually talk louder while he's on the phone in his office than when he has a face-to-face conversation with someone. On a few different occasions I have actually walked over to his office and closed the door while he was talking to someone (either on speakerphone, on the telephone handset, or in-person).

I don't understand why, if there is a door on your office, you don't CLOSE IT when you're having a conversation. No one wants to hear what you're talking about! If you want someone to join the conversation, please invite them into your office. If you don't want people to hear a private conversation, close the door. Additionally, lowering your voice is helpful, too! In most cases, the conversations this guy is having are of absolutely no interest to me.

Some people would argue that I could just ignore him. To that argument I say, "It's easier said than done." Even with earbuds playing music or laboratory-issued certified hearing protection for noisy environments, I can STILL hear hear his voice. It's ridiculous.

#121 Interrupting (Mid-Sentence)

The ability to be a good listener is an asset that a lot of people simply don't have these days. People tend to make more informed decisions based on the information provided if they are good listeners and catch everything being told to them. I understand that some people are simply hard of hearing to some degree or another, but when someone simply does not pay attention then blatantly cuts me off to say, "Huh??" in the middle of my thought or sentence, that really irritates the hell out of me.

If someone is speaking and you miss the first couple of words that they said, generally you can figure out the gist of what they're trying to say if you just keep listening. Once the speaker has finished their thought, if you still haven't grasped the point they’re trying to make, you can politely ask that they repeat what they said by telling them what you heard so they can fill in the rest.

But if someone begins a thought and midway through that thought (or word, even) you cut them off to blurt out "Huh??" because you didn't catch the first couple of words, that is completely rude and unnecessary.

#120 Spoons In Pots

Food preparation is a bit of an art form. More importantly, it takes coordination and planning. If you're not able to properly coordinate and plan a meal, you end up with warm foods that are cold and cooked foods that are overdone.

You really don't have to be a good cook to be able to coordinate a meal (of course it does help), but there are little things you can do to keep foods warm so that they can be eaten at an optimal temperature and not irritate people in the process. One of those things is to keep the lid on the pot instead of putting the serving spoon in the pot AND THEN putting the lid on it.

Someone I know recently went to the trouble of preparing an entire meal for us, and they even went as far as to turn off the ceiling fan above the table so that the food wouldn’t get cold. The problem with this theory, however, was that the food was already getting cold because they put the fucking spoon in the pot AND THEN PUT THE LID ON IT, so the heat was escaping from the pot the whole time it was sitting there prior to being served.

It shouldn't be too difficult to understand: if the lid is not on the pot correctly, the heat from inside the pot will escape and then the food will get cold. Easy enough, right? Apparently not. This person repeatedly does this, even after countless attempts (from me) to correct this behavior.

#119 Attempting to Avoid Perception of Laziness

Laziness is a major turnoff. I'm not opposed to being lazy on occasion because sometimes you JUST NEED TO be lazy in order to relax and recharge. However, people who are habitually lazy but say things to imply that they don't want to be perceived as lazy piss me off the most. Let me give you an example:

The trash is full and overflowing, so much so that in order to put more trash in the can one must physically remove the lid, insert the trash, then replace the lid in order for the trash to be contained (which, in and of itself, pisses me off), making it impossible for anyone after them to insert more trash because the same scenario (the lid cannot open because there's too much trash) repeats until someone finally removes the bag. When the lazy person in question sees me frustratingly removing the lid and removing the bag, they state, "I was going to do that" as if to tell me, "Don't think I'm lazy just because I didn't remove the garbage… I was going to get to it at some point. Like, probably when the bag gets so full that it rips while being removed creating yet another mess that needs to be cleaned."

Don't tell me "I was going to do that", but rather: DO IT. You knew when you removed the lid to fit more trash in there that the can was full and should probably be emptied. So why didn't you do it? If you had to throw anything else away after that, it would have taken more effort to remove the lid again than to just remove the bag then and there so a fresh bag could be inserted and the lid could swing freely. But, no. That did not happen. You were too lazy to do that.

This scenario doesn't only apply to trash, but to any other mandatory regularly-occurring task that needs to happen such as:

Unloading / loading the dishwasher. "I was going to do that."
Picking up dog poop. "I was going to do that."
Mowing the lawn. "I was going to do that."
Doing / putting away laundry. "I was going to do that."
Putting fuel in the car. "I was going to do that."
Getting the mail. "I was going to do that."
Making a meal. "I was going to do that."
Running the vacuum. "I was going to do that."
Cleaning the bathroom. "I was going to do that."

If you notice something that needs to happen (i.e. any of the above items or anything else) that you keep putting off, don't just look at it and think to yourself, "I should really do that..." and then NOT do it. Don’t be lazy. Be like the old Nike campaign: just do it.

#118 Communication of Information (over the phone)

Email addresses can be tricky, especially when company names or people's names are very long or when it's a homonym. However, when the domain name is easy and the prefix or "local" part is tricky, sometimes it becomes necessary to either sound it out or use examples (like the phonetic alphabet) when trying to communicate over the phone.

I work with a guy whose last name contains only 5 letters. At this business, our email addresses work in a few different methods: [first initial][last name]@[company].com, or more preferably [first initial][4-digits]@[company].com, where the 4 digits are either the last 4 of their Social Security Number or the 4-digit month/day they were hired (like April 25 would be 0425). Therefore, it would be easier for him to use his digits rather than try to spell out his last name since his name is a little unusual.

But does he think of using the 4 digits? No, of course not. He's so proud of his last name and so adamant about using it that he continuously spells his name out, calling out each letter (with an example), at least ten times per day. This occurs even more if he has to leave people voicemails! Let's assume his name is Brian Slays (it's not). Slays is not a difficult last name to spell, but over the phone it could be confused or misspelled – what I'm getting at is that it's not as obvious as Jones or Smith. So he will say, "...my email address is B as in Brian, S as in Sam, L as in Larry, A as in Apple, Y as in Yellow, S as in Sam, at [company].com".

Instead, he could just say, "B as in Brian, S as in Sam, 0 – 4 – 2 – 5 at [company].com". See? See how much more easy that was?! Less to say, and more direct. Numbers are WAY easier than letters over the phone. If it's available, why not use it??

I also understand that, for security purposes, people may be hesitant to use their 4-digits instead of their last name if it were the last numbers of their Social Security Number. By the way – whomever thought of that should have seriously reconsidered it before implementing that procedure. How about the last 4 of their employee number or something else instead?! Why the SSN? That's such an important group of numbers to be sharing with the world in light of all of the identity theft these days.

At any rate, people with longer names in the company I work for should definitely consider using their 4-digits, be it their SSN or hire date, instead of their full name. Or, you can do what I do, and just ask for their email address up front so you can email them your information instead of trying to communicate it over the phone. Let's not have to go the way of the fax machine, either.

#117 Dirty Dishes in the Sink

I have previously mentioned that I'm currently in a less-than-stellar living environment, and that there are certain things that bother me in this situation that I really can't control or even change for the duration of my home remodel... because it's not my house and not my family and I have no right to say anything or change anything. However, that doesn't mean I'm not allowed to dislike it. In this case, dirty dishes piled up in the sink are bothering me.

Please note that the display in this post's photo is NOT located in my current dwelling, but this photo does represents the annoyance I am faced with every single day. The person responsible for the dirty dishes in the sink insists that everyone else contribute to this person's delinquency as it pertains to their laziness of appropriate dirty-dish-placement. For example, rather than place my dirty dishes in the dishwasher (which is either clean and has been waiting to be emptied all day, or dirty and has only a few items loaded), this person would rather I stack my dirty dishes in the sink so that they, at a later time, can do all of the rinsing and loading into the dishwasher because everything needs to fit "just so" in order to run the dishwasher the least amount of times necessary.

Additionally, because the dishes are piled so high in the sink, it is next to impossible to even use the faucet at all, let alone do something sanitary like wash one's hands.

And not only do they go to such an extent to run the dishwasher as little as possible, but they pre-wash everything before it goes into the dishwasher. I don't mean like just removing chunks of food and giving it a slight rinse... I mean they full-on wipe the dishes with a sponge with soap before loading everything into the machine.

Yesterday I went out of my way to make sure that I loaded the dishwasher (as "just so" as I could possibly fathom), ran it, emptied it, and re-loaded with the few dishes in the sink before going to bed, and then today when I came home there were dirty dishes in the sink rather than placed in the dishwasher to keep them from stinking up the kitchen or clogging up the sink.

Teabags. Used teabags. USED! In the sink!!! WHYYY?!???!??! THROW THEM AWAY!!!!!!!!!