#137 Lost Pets

I live in a pretty small community of about 800 full-time residents. The boundaries of our community are waterways, and there is no way onto our island except by boat or car ferry. Our island utilizes the resources of a private social network site where everyone can post things that have meaning to the community. It's also a place where local business can post specials, and community events can be publicized. Another topic, among several, is "Lost and Found."

Recently (on August 31st, 2015) a family lost their 3-year-old male brindle cattle dog mix. This is not the first time the dog has gotten out of their fenced-in yard, and I know this because they have posted about it on our community social network site previously. Usually the dog was recovered within a day or so. This time, the dog is still missing over two weeks later. They have even enlisted the help of a service to locate their pet, now offering a $1,000 reward for recovery. They have posted laminated flyers all over our island, as well as in neighboring communities, and have also posted on other social networking sites to get the word out.

On one hand, I feel bad for this family for losing their pet. On the other hand, I don't. Not because I'm a horrible person (which I'm not) and not because I don’t care about animals (which I do), but if this dog has gotten out before, *something else* could have been done to make sure the dog didn't get out again. I couldn't say whether a higher fence, or keeping the dog on a lead, or any number of other things would have been an appropriate solution to keeping their dog from getting out of their yard, but it could have been something. Anything. But that didn't happen.

The postings that this family is making our networking site are getting to be a bit ridiculous. Here is an excerpt from an actual post made by one of the family members:

"[Dog's name] has been missing for 2 weeks now. Someone has taken him and we need him back. If you are an island resident, please contact any people (out-of-towners) that you know that were on the island the week of August 31st. He is missed terribly by his family, and we just want him home. Someone had to have taken him to the mainland, or STILL has him on the island."

I'm sure this family member is just trying to keep hope alive, but to accuse someone of taking him and keeping him (or even dropping him somewhere) seems a bit absurd and unreasonable. They're basically insinuating that local residents are doing something totally underhanded here, and that's pretty insulting.

There are several theories as to what happened, but here are my top theories why I think this dog is not coming home:

1. He went for a swim and got caught by the current and drowned.
2. He got eaten by one of several coyotes spotted on the island.
3. He got hit by a car and is lying in a ditch / weeds somewhere.

The same family member continues to post to our social networking site saying, "Someone on the island knows something but is choosing not to speak up. If that person is you... SHAME ON YOU!!!!" After publishing this comment, the author removed it about 20 minutes later once someone else commented something along the lines of, "If someone knew something, they would have said something by now."

Personally I think it is a waste of time, money, and effort looking for a dog in this situation. Especially now, over two weeks after the fact? That dog is long gone. Give it up; let it go. Move on. Besides, shaming or attempting to shame someone on a social networking site is not an appropriate way to get a response.

#135 Fire Hydrant Obstruction

I am a full-time resident of a community of approximately 700 people. However, every summer, the population of my community jumps to about ten times that. Many people have summer homes or cottages that they visit on the weekends, and from Memorial Day through Labor Day my community is a busy, bustling place. We locals call these people "cidiots." City + idiot = cidiot. Here's one of the many reasons:

The Licensing and Regulatory Affairs in the state in which I live have posted press releases in recent years reminding residents to keep a 3-foot minimum radius of clearance from fire hydrants so that first responders can quickly access this essential equipment. These press releases are generally released during the winter months when snow removal is a total pain in the ass essential, but it really applies all year round.

I'm struggling to understand the logic behind placing the trash bags immediately surrounding the fire hydrant. This particular residence has at least 60 feet of street frontage, not including the driveway. Why was this location selected out of all other potential locations? Did the residents think that the trash collectors would not see their heaping pile of garbage bags if they were in a different location - perhaps 20 or 30 feet away? I mean, it is literally the trash collectors' job to drive up and down the street and collect the garbage at the side of the road. There could be no possible way that they would miss this heap if it were anywhere else along the property line.

Considering the location of this particular hydrant, I am extremely pissed off that these residents think this is acceptable. This is the closest hydrant to my house, and if a fire occurred and the hydrant needed to be accessed, this could potentially cause a delay with getting water onto the fire. I wonder if the people who dumped this garbage considered the same for their cottage? Oh right, probably not, because they don't really "need" their cottage. They would likely be pleased they could claim it as a total loss and get a big fat check to build a new cottage in its place.

So, yeah: cidiots.

#134 Shopping Carts (Proper Disposition - Part 2)

I should have added this to my rant in #074 of my blog, but this instance was so ridiculous I couldn't even fathom the possibility of this even happening, which is why I didn't include it previously.

Why? I just....... How could you even........ Are you fucking kidding me?

I couldn't just ignore your incomprehensible and inexcusable shopping cart placement and just drive away (forward) from the situation since there was clearly another car parked in front of me. You have purposely inconvenienced someone else (in this case, ME) by being such a lazy piece of shit that you couldn't move your shopping cart elsewhere when you were finished with it. What the fuck is wrong with you?! You were obviously not parked in a designated handicapped spot - to which I still would have been pissed off but slightly less so, considering the possibility of whatever handicap you could be facing.

Dick move, man. DICK. MOVE.

#132 Driving Without Confidence

I have a 46-mile commute to work (one-way) each weekday. I don't love that I have a long commute, but I do love where I live and that makes up for the amount of time I spend in my car every day. Public transportation is not an option for me in my area, so I am forced to drive my vehicle. I have accepted this fact a long time ago.

Also, I live in an area of the United States which experiences all four seasons, and the winter season can last anywhere between November and March depending on the weather patterns. This can make commuting to-and-from work a bit of a nightmare for me and the many other drivers on the road.

At the beginning of my commute I have to navigate 17 miles to the nearest interstate, and 11 of those miles is a 2-lane road (one lane in either direction). There are back / country roads that could be taken as an alternative route, but these 11 miles of 2-lane roadway is the main thoroughfare for practically everyone in my surrounding neighborhoods. The speed limit is 50 miles per hour so it goes by quickly, especially since everyone routinely drives 5-15 mph over the speed limit.

This particular 2-lane roadway is not very straight. That is, the road twists and curves gradually around a body of water. This enables a great line of sight between the front of the "line" of cars, and the back of the "line" when there is traffic.

Overnight we experienced a light dusting of snow, but nothing that was threatening to the roadways. This morning had very heavy traffic conditions on this 2-lane road, and it wasn't until I got around a curve did I realize what the holdup was: an uneasy driver, at the front of the line, literally holding up over 80 vehicles.

First of all, safety is critical. I don't fault this woman (and it was a woman) for driving slowly. What I DO fault her for is not getting out of the fucking way. At the beginning of this 11-mile stretch, traffic was already moving slowly. So slowly, in fact, that traffic was moving along at a whopping 31 miles per hour with a lot of stop-and-go action. At the moment the road first curved and I could see what was going on, I knew that my commute was going to suck hard.

People began passing when it was safe to do so. As I mentioned, this particular road is a main thoroughfare both in and out of town, so it's not like there wasn't any traffic going the other way. People were so desperate to pass her that they often used a center turn lane when it became available (for a short stretch of road), and some even used the shoulder.

Here's my main complaint: she could see both in front of and behind her vehicle for quite a ways (up to a mile in some spots!). She could definitely see that traffic was piling up behind her. She could definitely see that people were attempting to pass her illegally. It is my opinion that if she noticed these things, she should have pulled off the road, let traffic pass her by, then proceed to continue slowly with her commute. She shouldn't make everyone else suffer because of her lack of confidence on the road.

Once I was able to pass her, my timing was already pushed back into rush hour even worse than it was to start with. My commute this morning which normally takes about an hour, took nearly 2 hours because of the initial delay and now the additional traffic. Thanks a lot, bitch. As if my blood pressure wasn't high enough already.

#131 Punctuality (Time Management)

I have previously written about my mandatory one-hour lunch at work, and I have also written about punctuality in general. This particular rant encompasses both.

Every day at 11:30 I have to take my hour-long lunch. Every. Day. At 11:30. This never changes.

Every day at 11:30 I have agreed to leave work with someone to go run errands and grab lunch on the way. Every. Day. At 11:30. This never changes.

Yet EVERY DAY I am left searching the office for this person, or fetching this person from their desk at 11:30. Why? Well, that is a very good question. I would like to know the answer myself!

In a perfect world, I would look up at my rear-view desk mirror and notice that this person is walking up behind me with their coat on and car keys in hand. Ultimately, this is the goal. Perhaps I haven't nagged them enough yet. Perhaps I haven't trained them hard enough. Perhaps I haven't given them enough shit about how much it aggravates me that I have to go and search for them or remind them of the time. Perhaps they're just a self-centered dick who doesn't care about my feelings or being on time for any.fucking.thing in the world. Perhaps they just don't care.

I have even scheduled a reminder in their work calendar so that it pops up to remind them that in 15 minutes they should be leaving. The reminder is also set to pop up at 11:25 to give them a 5-minute heads-up. And, once again, it will remind them at 11:30, practically shouting, "Get off your ass, put your coat on, and walk over to Melanie's desk because it's TIME TO GO."

I doubt I will ever understand why people seem to lack the ability to manage their time properly, especially when their actions (or lack of actions) affect others. It seems like these people will never understand how truly frustrating they are to people like me.

#130 Restroom Stall Spacing

Having to use a public restroom while at work is a reality for many people. It's bad enough that we have to do our private business in a not-very-private place, but if people paid more attention to stall spacing (or urinal spacing, if you're male) things would be slightly less uncomfortable.

From what I understand, men have a hard-and-fast rule about using public urinals: always leave at least a one-urinal buffer between yourself and the next guy. This is especially important for the first guy up to the urinal: he sets the spacing for all those that follow him while he's in there.

I really wish that women would follow this thinking. Here is a photo of a restroom that I was in today.

Twice today when I went into this restroom someone was in the #2 standard-sized stall. In order to create (what I consider) proper spacing, what she should have done was chosen either the #1 or #3 standard-sized stall, or the handicap stall. Since the toilet in the handicap stall is against the far wall, there is already a built-in buffer between the handicap stall and the #3 standard-sized stall, so one person could occupy each of those and still have decent spacing between them. This would allow a third person to use the restroom in the #1 stall, all while maintaining the comfort of adequate spacing.

Hearing other people urinate is not so much an issue, but hearing other people poop is just disgusting. The farther away from me that you are while you're doing it, the better. Everyone poops, but I really don't want to hear it or even think about other people doing it.

#127 Inconsideration (Time)

Time is incredibly valuable; you can never get it back. What we do with our personal time is sacred these days, so when someone is inconsiderate of my time I get really frustrated.

I recently borrowed a vehicle from someone to use for a specific purpose. They knew I was coming to pick it up at least a few hours in advance. They knew approximately what time I would be arriving and they knew that I only had a short amount of time to pick it up and leave since I was on my lunch hour from work. They also knew that I had to rely on someone else to take me there, therefore using up someone else’s valuable time.

When I arrived, they were completely ill-prepared. They didn't greet me at the door when I arrived. They took their time coming outside. They didn't have the keys ready. They didn't have essential items cleared out of it. They couldn't locate the key fob. They proceeded to engage in a lengthy conversation about some random crap that had nothing to do with the vehicle.

Something that could have literally taken less than 5 minutes took nearly 20 minutes.

Then another incident happened with the same person. This person needed something that I had in my possession, and called me at 10:15 pm to ask me to bring it with me to work the next day. This person was going out of town and needed what I had. Since I was nearly in bed by this point, I had to get dressed to go outside to the garage to fetch what they needed, then put it in my vehicle to take to work the next day.

Once I got to work the next day, they called and said they were coming to pick it up from my place of employment, but that they needed to shower first but they would be there in 20 minutes. With this person, 20 minutes = at least 35. I was leaving work in 30 minutes (again, they waited until the very last possible moment) and I was not about to be late because I have commitments that need to be kept. There was NO WAY this person was going to make it by the time I left. Instead, this person had to go out of their way to get what they needed rather than making a compromise with me, which ended up making them irritated and put off because of the situation.

IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE THIS WAY, PEOPLE.

Simple preparation and adequate communication solves lots of headaches down the road. Just take a couple minutes to prepare for the situation ahead of you, discuss the details with those parties affected, and you will make those around you happy.

If you don't have time to prepare ahead of time, at least let the other person(s) know. They may be able to adjust their schedule to better accommodate the situation, and won't be so disappointed and frustrated when they arrive and have to deal with your lack of preparation and wasting their precious time.

#120 Spoons In Pots

Food preparation is a bit of an art form. More importantly, it takes coordination and planning. If you're not able to properly coordinate and plan a meal, you end up with warm foods that are cold and cooked foods that are overdone.

You really don't have to be a good cook to be able to coordinate a meal (of course it does help), but there are little things you can do to keep foods warm so that they can be eaten at an optimal temperature and not irritate people in the process. One of those things is to keep the lid on the pot instead of putting the serving spoon in the pot AND THEN putting the lid on it.

Someone I know recently went to the trouble of preparing an entire meal for us, and they even went as far as to turn off the ceiling fan above the table so that the food wouldn’t get cold. The problem with this theory, however, was that the food was already getting cold because they put the fucking spoon in the pot AND THEN PUT THE LID ON IT, so the heat was escaping from the pot the whole time it was sitting there prior to being served.

It shouldn't be too difficult to understand: if the lid is not on the pot correctly, the heat from inside the pot will escape and then the food will get cold. Easy enough, right? Apparently not. This person repeatedly does this, even after countless attempts (from me) to correct this behavior.

#119 Attempting to Avoid Perception of Laziness

Laziness is a major turnoff. I'm not opposed to being lazy on occasion because sometimes you JUST NEED TO be lazy in order to relax and recharge. However, people who are habitually lazy but say things to imply that they don't want to be perceived as lazy piss me off the most. Let me give you an example:

The trash is full and overflowing, so much so that in order to put more trash in the can one must physically remove the lid, insert the trash, then replace the lid in order for the trash to be contained (which, in and of itself, pisses me off), making it impossible for anyone after them to insert more trash because the same scenario (the lid cannot open because there's too much trash) repeats until someone finally removes the bag. When the lazy person in question sees me frustratingly removing the lid and removing the bag, they state, "I was going to do that" as if to tell me, "Don't think I'm lazy just because I didn't remove the garbage… I was going to get to it at some point. Like, probably when the bag gets so full that it rips while being removed creating yet another mess that needs to be cleaned."

Don't tell me "I was going to do that", but rather: DO IT. You knew when you removed the lid to fit more trash in there that the can was full and should probably be emptied. So why didn't you do it? If you had to throw anything else away after that, it would have taken more effort to remove the lid again than to just remove the bag then and there so a fresh bag could be inserted and the lid could swing freely. But, no. That did not happen. You were too lazy to do that.

This scenario doesn't only apply to trash, but to any other mandatory regularly-occurring task that needs to happen such as:

Unloading / loading the dishwasher. "I was going to do that."
Picking up dog poop. "I was going to do that."
Mowing the lawn. "I was going to do that."
Doing / putting away laundry. "I was going to do that."
Putting fuel in the car. "I was going to do that."
Getting the mail. "I was going to do that."
Making a meal. "I was going to do that."
Running the vacuum. "I was going to do that."
Cleaning the bathroom. "I was going to do that."

If you notice something that needs to happen (i.e. any of the above items or anything else) that you keep putting off, don't just look at it and think to yourself, "I should really do that..." and then NOT do it. Don’t be lazy. Be like the old Nike campaign: just do it.

#116 Punctuality (Appearance)

I work with someone who literally lives two streets away from the facility (less than a half mile) and this person is constantly arriving to work 15 minutes late and showing up with wet hair. It's definitely not some sort of "wet-look" product they are using in their hair either, because it's dry in a matter of about an hour.

If you're running late for work for any reason, you will likely take a quicker shower than usual because you know you're running behind. That is of, course, that you actually care about your job... That being said, perhaps you need to wake up just a smidge earlier in order to make it to work on time???? Or, if you really can't spare the 5 minutes it takes to blow-dry your hair, perhaps you should consider showering at night instead. Seriously, if it takes you less than 2 minutes to drive to work, maybe you shouldn't set your alarm for the time you actually have to BE at work.

#115 Trash (Emptying)

Currently my house is under construction and I'm in a living situation that is less than ideal for my mental well-being. However, it is extremely cheap and I'm getting a lot of free daycare (and I'm very close to the project), so I really can't complain too much. But one thing I can't stand about living where I am is the trash situation in this household.

I have written about trash before, but this is a little different. This family goes through so much trash I can't even believe it. In my household we typically fill a tall kitchen garbage can full of trash in about 6 days. Changing the trash in this household occurs on a daily basis. I believe this largely has to do with the fact that they don't recycle (shame on them), so bottles and cans that should otherwise be recycled are not compressed and take up a lot of space in the garbage can.

Also, everyone is so lazy that they just fill and fill and overfill the garbage can until the lid will no longer close because there is so much trash in there, and no one takes the lid off to remove the bag and replace it with a new one. Because, you know, if you empty the garbage can, you actually have to (gasp!) take the bag outside and walk down (and then up again?!) some stairs to the outdoor garbage can. It seems like every time I go to throw something away the garbage can is already full again. I feel like I just emptied it!!! Oh wait... I did.

#111 Gift Receipts

Another holiday season has come and (thankfully) gone, and people everywhere are returning gifts they received that they didn't like. I, however, had a more difficult time returning gifts this year because one side of my family decided not to include a gift receipt with their gifts given to me, which coincidentally happens every single year.

I don't get it. Why not include a gift receipt?! If I give someone a gift, I always include a gift receipt just in case anything is even slightly off with what I decided that person probably likes... why? Because I'm not right all of the time, and I would rather give them the receipt up front so they can deal with having to exchange or return it without having to ask me for the receipt later. That way, I can go about thinking that I picked out a good gift and I would be none the wiser that they didn't like it or it was the wrong thing. If they didn't like it, they wouldn't tell me, so I can just assume that they liked it and go about my merry way.

People's feelings are at stake here. Do I risk upsetting my mother-in-law by asking her for the receipt for a shirt that she bought me that is too small (bless her heart for thinking I wear that size)? No. I just go to the store she bought it from and buy something for my son instead. The problem is that I probably won't get back the money that she paid for it because I don't have the receipt. She likely purchased it at a higher price than what the price is after the holiday, so technically we're both losing and the store gets to keep the extra money. Besides, even if I asked her for the receipt later, the chances of her finding it are slim-to-none anyways.

Then there's the case of duplicate gifts. What if the gift someone gave you was so awesome that someone else decided they were going to give you the same gift? You probably don't need 2 of them, so you'd likely return one. However, if the only place to return it was to a store that you don't like to shop, you're stuck with a merchandise credit for that store and you end up having to spend money there when you'd rather have money to spend elsewhere for something you need rather than some frivolous gift you are forced to purchase for yourself or someone else.

I seriously would rather receive nothing at all than something I didn't want that I would have to go return to a store. I hate shopping. Perhaps I sound ungrateful that I am receiving gifts at all, but I would rather not do a gift exchange if that were an option. I'm SO OVER IT. If it weren't for people's feelings, I would simply opt out of these types of family functions altogether because I just don't like doing it anymore. It's more of a pain in the ass now than it has ever been before.

What it comes down to is this: get to know the person you're purchasing a gift for, so you know what kinds of things they like and especially what they don't like. This will save everyone a lot of hassle in the long run. But if you're not going to do that, at least include a gift receipt.

#110 Copier Issues

Technology is a force to be reckoned with. It is in our everyday lives, and is nearly impossible to avoid.

At my office there are several "copy" machines which are used for making copies, printing, faxing, and scanning. Don't get me started about faxing, but using this machine is pretty straightforward. This type of machine has been around for at least a decade, so people who have been in office settings for quite some time should be accustomed to them.

However, this is apparently not the case. My desk is situated within earshot of this multipurpose machine, and people are routinely perplexed by the multitude of functions available. They are also frustrated when something goes wrong, and just look at the machine as if their eyes should be able to solve the problem rather than following some simple steps in order to resolve the issue.

For example, according to this Wikipedia page, the US and Canada are the only countries that have not adopted the ISO standard for paper sizes. In this day and age of global business practices, it should be expected that some documents will get formatted to an "A4" or other ISO paper size. So when they are printed in the US or Canada the printers don't recognize this size and require assistance from the user. I don't usually think to check the document size before I print so I wouldn't expect anyone else to check either, but the printer starts freaking out and beeping and flashing lights to alert the user that there was an error and some assistance is required. There's a bright red button that you have to push and select an alternate paper size because that paper size isn't already loaded in the printer. LITERALLY it's just two steps, but people just can't seem to figure it out or comprehend what happened!

There is also someone in my office who regularly has to scan documents. However, the sheets of paper this person receives to scan are always crinkled up with corners folded and dirty and just overall not very "flat" pieces of paper. This person tries to use the auto-feed feature where the printer sucks the paper in, scans it, then spits it back out, but since the sheets of paper are so untidy they tend to jam the machine which makes the process take longer and results in this person swearing at the machine under their breath.

Also, adding paper to the machine..... I really fail to see the difficulty in this task, however yesterday someone managed to fill the machine with paper on THE OTHER SIDE of the plastic divider that holds the paper in place. But seriously, don't get me started on printer paper replenishment. This person just could NOT figure out why their document didn't print even though they JUST loaded the printer full of paper.

#109 Distributing Leftovers

Consuming leftover meals is a great way to make sure that food doesn't spoil, but also to save money. Taking leftovers to work for lunch the next day ensures you don't spend money on going to a restaurant which can add up quickly when done on a regular basis.

However, placing the leftovers in the refrigerator by leaving the food in whatever it was cooked in is annoying. Instead, take the extra step and distribute the food into smaller portions and place them into individual containers.

Say you make a casserole of some sort. If you're like me and you don't like to cook, you make a large-enough casserole for dinner so that you can have leftovers and not have to make another meal the next day. Once you've eaten your casserole for dinner, divide up what's left and put it into separate, smaller containers for lunch the next day. Doing this makes it incredibly easy to grab right before leaving for work in the morning. Also, it allows you a bit of portion control.

Don't be lazy: take the extra step and split it up before calling it a night.

#108 Volume Level (TV / radio)

Everyone's sense of hearing is a little different. What is too loud for one person can be perfectly acceptable or too quiet for someone else. However, when it comes to electronics that have sound controls, everyone should turn the volume down to a low volume before turning them off.

I recently visited with friends of mine and their 2-year-old daughter was playing with a soft ball. She tossed the ball and it hit the power button on a clock-radio and the radio came on at seemingly full volume. It scared her such that her whole body shook and she started crying because it startled her so badly. Who the hell leaves their clock-radio on the heavy metal station at full blast?!

We have a woman come to our house and clean every couple of weeks. While she's cleaning she turns the TV up really loudly so she can hear it in all parts of the house. However, she doesn't return the volume to a lower level when she leaves, so when we turn the TV on later it's extremely loud. This is horribly inconvenient when my baby's sleeping and I just want to zone out and watch some tv for a while. Instead, the TV wakes up my child and then I can't watch TV because I have to calm a crying baby.

Driving someone else's vehicle is awkward enough - you have to worry about adjusting the seat, mirrors, steering wheel, armrest... so when you turn on the vehicle, the last thing you want is to have the radio blasting your head off, especially if you don't even like their taste in music! Even if they don't leave the radio ON when the vehicle is started, they should still return it to a low volume before turning it OFF as well.

#107 Turn Signals

I do a lot of driving, mainly due to my proximity to the places I frequent. Therefore, I suppose it's only natural that most of my frustrations and annoyances come from something I do a lot (second probably to working).

In this country, most people begin learning how to drive in their mid-teens. However, we are all exposed to vehicles our entire lives. We are placed in cars from the moment we come home from the hospital after being born, so we should be observing and picking up on how to operate them properly from a very early age... right? Properly was the operative word in that last question.

I guess it just comes down to laziness, but people simply don't use their turn signals anymore. A lot of people actually do, but there are just not enough of them on the road. It seems hard to believe sometimes, but every vehicle on the road is equipped with them - you would never know this by observing all of the drivers who don't even acknowledge their existence. In fact, according to Wikipedia, turn signals have been around since as early as 1907. That's right, turn signals have been around for over a century and people STILL haven't figured out how to use them.

Everyone (including myself) is in such a hurry these days, if more people used their turn signals we would quite possibly reduce the amount of frustration AND traffic accidents on the road. Knowing where someone is headed (the purpose of a turn signal) can help everyone move their vehicle with greater confidence and everyone can maintain higher speeds or get to where they're going faster.

I can't tell you the countless times I pull into the same intersection wanting to turn left, when the person headed toward the instersection doesn't pass me but turns before the intersection coming from either direction. Had they used their turn signal, I could have pulled out already instead of waiting for them to not even pass in front of me.

#099 Road Killings (Turtles)

In the late spring and early summer months, the area in which I live sees a lot of painted turtles crossing the roads. Since there are plenty of marshy areas and slow-moving bodies of water nearby, the turtles seem to thrive in such an environment. However, with an overabundance of people not paying attention (and the few drivers who are such sick bastards that they actually attempt to run them over), many turtles don't get to make it across the road and are killed by vehicles every day.

I don't get it. I mean, it's not like the turtle just ran out into the road and you couldn't avoid running it over. It's not like it just popped up at the last second and you're like "Oh, SHIT!" and you suddenly have to try to swerve out of the way...... NO. Turtles move slowly. VERY slowly. There is absolutely NO REASON that anyone should run over a turtle on any roadway. Period.

Say you're on a dirt road and you spot a turtle: drive around it.
Say you're on a two-lane rural road or highway: drive around it.
Say you're on any type of road with or without traffic: drive around it, or slow down so that you CAN drive around it if traffic does not permit you to drive around it at that time. And if you can't slow down enough to do this, you're probably driving too fast (so slow the fuck down already).

See? How hard was that?!

I don't claim to be a turtle-rights advocate or anything, but don't run over turtles! They didn't do anything to you. They're probably just trying to procreate..... would you want someone trying to kill you every time you tried to have sex? I didn't think so.

#095 Interrupting (Prior Engagements)

Time away from family or social obligations is pretty rare for me these days; I quite enjoy having time to myself on occasion. So when I'm in the middle of doing something on my To-Do List and the people closest to me know that I'm busy doing something, I get extremely irritated when someone calls me "just to talk". It is even more annoying when I remind that person that I'm busy and they continue with the conversation regardless of my subtle indication of having something more important to do at the moment.

Don't get me wrong, occasionally I get the urge to call someone "just to talk", but I always ask them ahead of time whether or not it is convenient to proceed with leisurely conversation. If at any point someone indicates that the conversation must end, I will immediately wrap up the call regardless of whether or not my point was made – this conversation can always be completed at a later time. When others call me "just to talk" I expect them to treat me the same way, but unfortunately this is NEVER the case with one particular individual in my life.

Very often I am in the middle of doing something and this person will call, and I will remind them that I'm busy and I need to finish what I'm doing and that I will call them back later. They say they understand but that they "just wanted to tell me" whatever it was they called me about, but they continue to talk about their topic that has little value to me while I'm right in the middle of doing something.

It's not that I don't care what this person has to say: quite the contrary. What they have to tell me is probably relatively important, but if it can wait an hour or two or six, then it should. I end up having to be stern with this person, and they always end up being offended that I pushed them away from the call... but what else can I do? I politely tell this person that I'm busy, yet they continue to talk. If being rude or stern with this person is the only way to get my point across, then that's what I have to do.

Generally I won't even answer the phone if I'm in the middle of something, but this person will call a few times within a few minutes... that would indicate to me that the purpose for the call is important. So when I call this person back to find out why such frequent calls were placed in such a short amount of time, only to find out that they "just wanted to talk", I get PISSED OFF.

#094 Enunciation (Phrases)

Radio stations are supposed to have skilled speakers providing information to the listener in a clear, concise manner where the listener should not have to struggle to understand what the speaker is saying. This is especially the case for news radio stations and weather and traffic reports (information critical to the listeners).

On a local radio station, a particular meteorologist always combines the words in the phrases "this morning" and "this afternoon". He combines the words such that the s is almost completely left off the word "this" and then connected to the front of "afternoon" or "evening": it turns into "thi-safternoon" or "thi-sevening". He's not speaking particularly fast and it doesn't seem like he's pressed for time, so I don't understand why he can't just slow down when he says these phrases so that he can clearly enunciate each word individually. He actually does the same thing to "this morning" but it's not noticed as much because the second word starts with a consonant and not a vowel.

Every time he says this, I literally want to reach through the radio and just smack him in the face. If I didn't want to hear the traffic report and weather forecast so badly, I would just change the station altogether and not listen to it at all!

#092 Pronunciation (The Number 0)

People in the United States have slightly different ways of writing certain numbers on paper than do people elsewhere in the world, namely Europe. However, no matter how it is physically written on paper, the number 1 is still pronounced one in the United States.

Apparently this is not the case for the number 0.

A popular news radio station in my metropolitan area has been recently running an advertisement where the announcer clearly states (and repeats!) the last four digits of the telephone number for the business: double-oh eleven. The fact that he states the last two digits as eleven instead of one one is annoying enough (that will have to be a future blog post), but is it really too much to ask to throw in the first extra syllable for the number zero? The announcer is dictating the phone number to the listener, and should the listener want to take note of the phone number, it would be easier for the listener to follow zero zero one one instead of double-oh eleven.

Take, for example, a vehicle license plate. If you witnessed a crime, and a vehicle was involved, you would need to tell the police the identification of the license plate. If you tell them that the identification number consisted of "one oh zee", they would likely ask you if you could tell whether or not it was the letter O or the number 0. There is a difference!

"Oh" is not a number; "zero" is a number.